An imbalance is established right away in Alana and Sammie’s relationship when Alana is unaware that her excitement to discover a woman’s profile she likes has been met by Sammie’s disinterest (verging on disdain) for someone she judges to be insensitive and superficial.
Although Sammie’s judgement of Alana is revealed mostly in Sammie’s ‘private’ sharing with cameras (and viewers), a private comment from Antonio reminds us that when Alana is Blocked, Sammie (her rival of the same gender) will be presumed responsible despite it being a decision orchestrated by Antonio in his joint decision making pow-wow with Sammie.
Using Personality to anchor perceptions of ourselves and others can help us resist the temptation to make the kind of assumptions Antonio is counting on.
As referenced in the previous post, Alana’s Physical Explorer Personality experiences life as a flow of present moments, with very minimal energy directed at the past or the future; while Sammie’s Ideas Connector Personality weaves an endless tapestry of thoughts and feelings that challenge the limits of space and time. For Alana, connection to another person is rooted in shared experience of the physical world. For Sammie, connection to another person is rooted in shared ideas, feelings and values.
The Core Personalities of Alana and Sammie make up two of nine personality types in the UnConflict Personality system:
- Social Explorer
- Social Changemaker
- Social Connector
- Ideas Explorer
- Ideas Changemaker
- Ideas Connector (Sammie’s Core Personality)
- Physical Explorer (Alana’s Core Personality)
- Physical Changemaker
- Physical Connector (looping back to Social Explorer)
Each Personality type answers these two questions:
Does this person experience life most strongly through…
- their Relationships? “Social”
- their Thoughts and Feelings? “Ideas”
- the Physical World? “Physical”
And, what motivates this person to deal with life’s endless barrage of challenges? Is it…
- the feeling of living each moment to the fullest? “Explorer”
- the hope of making a difference? “Changemaker”
- the satisfaction that comes with building some kind of cohesion in a world of chaos? “Connector”
Alana’s Core Physical Explorer Personality means that she connects with life primarily through her Physical experience. And it is the thrill of Exploring each moment to the fullest that motivates her to keep going in tough times.
Sammie’s Core Ideas Connector Personality means that she connects with life primarily through her thoughts and feelings (Ideas). And it is the peace that comes with unifying fragments (Connecting) that motivates her through adversity.
Not only do Alana and Sammie access different primary portals to life and human connection. Their Bodyguard Personalities make things even more complicated, adding dimensions of conflict to the already elevated stress of The Circle’s high-stakes game. The next post will discuss the impact of Bodyguard personalities on Alana and Sammie’s relationship dynamic.